Mommy's Little Helpers

Posted: May 26, 2009 9:35 AM
Updated: May 26, 2009 9:35 AM

Real Families, Real FUN: Happy Home
Mommy's Little Helpers
By By Diana McKeon Charkalis for Real Families, Real Fun

When it was time to clean the windows, Amy Walker's six-year-old son, Richard, begged to use the spray bottle. At first, the Sanibel Island, Florida-based Walker resisted. She didn't want him to accidentally get a face full of chemicals. But then his enthusiasm sparked an idea: "I filled an old bottle with water so he could help me finish up," she says. "He had so much fun, I began to recruit his help on more and more chores. Now he does all kinds of chores!"

Raising kids who pitch in around the house helps them as much as it helps you. Kids who are expected to do their fair share tend to develop a sense of accomplishment and pride. They also learn how to handle responsibility. And, when kids don't help out, it can lead to resentment and exhaustion for Mom and Dad -- which is no fun.

The key is to start early and be patient. "Children usually have an interest in helping even before they have the ability -- so start them off young with something simple," says Elizabeth Crary, author of Pick Up Your Socks and Other Skills Growing Children Need (Parenting Press). "At first, it may take you more time to teach a child something than it would for you to just finish the work yourself, but your time investment will pay off in the end."

Ready to get started? Follow these five pointers for putting your kids to work.

Baby steps

Start with a basic task and build from there. "Choose something quick and easy," Crary suggests. Starter chores might include putting toys away, stacking books on a shelf, or helping sweep the floor. Making it a game adds to the fun: "Hand kids a dust pan and say, 'I'll make a pile -- see if you can catch it!' " Walker suggests.

Incentives

Charts have worked well for Elisa Leone of New Paltz, New York. First, she laminates pictures that her kids, Wesley, 6, and Maria, 3, cut out from magazines. The images reflect the tasks they do: For example, a tube of toothpaste represents brushing their teeth. When they finish a task, they move the picture from the "to do" chart to the "done" chart. Once they have completed ten tasks, they earn a small reward.

Stay in tune

Play music to help energize everyone and put family members in the mood to pitch in, suggests Crary. "Clean to the beat of the music, or dance along now and then," she says.

Match game

Tailor the chores to your child's abilities and interests. "For example, a more physical child may run letters to the mailbox," Crary says. "A quieter child may prefer placing stamps on the envelopes when you're paying bills."

Togetherness

It's more fun doing chores together than solo. For instance, Walker helps her sons fold laundry while they relax and watch a video. "I try to integrate chores so that they become part of the rhythm of the day," she says. "This creates the feeling that we're all contributing members of our family." Working together as a team will make you closer and boost your family bond.

Diana McKeon Charkalis is a freelance writer and mom in Sherman Oaks, California.