Love is in the air, it's valentine's day!
Here's a brief history of the day:
Valentine's day is derived from the feast for the patron saint-- Valentine.
Historians tell the story of one saint who married couples in secret to prevent men from going to war.
In the 14-hundreds, the day became associated with romance.
People started writing letters and poems declaring their love and calling them "Valentines."
In fact, 180 million cards are exchanged each year and florists prepare nearly two million roses.
Moving on to the 5 love languages...
If you're in a relationship and everything is going mostly well but you can't see eye to eye on certain things... it may be that you are speaking different 'love languages'.
"Love languages are very important because it's how we interpret that we feel loved, valued, and appreciated by our mate," said Winter.
If you are interested in finding out your love language, you can always take this quiz to find out...plus it's something fun to do with your partner. Then, come back to this story and see if the examples listed match your way of loving or the way you love to be loved.
When we learn about each love language and which ones apply to our significant other, we can better understand ourselves and our partners and how each shows and wants to receive love.
1) Words of affirmation.
"If you want your partner to keep doing the good things they're doing, you have to keep encouraging them by noticing it and acknowledging their contribution," said Susan Winters, the Relationship Expert.
Some words of affirmation could be...
- "I believe in you"
- "I'm so proud of you"
- "Thank you for taking out the garbage"
It's important for you to acknowledge the good that your partner is doing.
2) Acts of service.
"Oftentimes the person who doesn't articulate, how much they care for you, we'll show you by acts of service," said Winter.
In other words, this means they show or want love through actions instead of verbal words or communication.
Examples of acts of service:
- cooking a meal
- picking up your dry cleaning
- walking your dog
- any physical acts of service
This shows them that "I'm going out of my way to assist you because I care for you."
3) Receiving gifts or 'gift-giving.'
"We oftentimes dismiss this category as being superficial or materialistic and it can easily be construed as such," said Winter.
However it's a little deeper than just the object given, some people love seeing tangible items to remind them of their loved ones.
"It's because you've listened and you know, what's important to them. So it signifies more than just I'm giving you a gift," said Winter.
- a certain edition of a book or a comic book
- tickets to a sporting event or concert
- a tee shirt with their favorite band or movie on it
- their favorite candy
4) Quality time
"This gives your partner who values quality time as their love language, the feeling of being seen and heard and valued and adored," said Winter.
- turning off your cell phones and setting it aside
- focus on being in the moment
- dinner/ cooking together
- Going on a walk together
When you're focused on the time where you are present, paying attention to listening, absorbing in and single focused on your partner, it creates a powerful connection.
5) Physical Touch
"These are all very basic human qualities that we want to feel and like to feel," said Winter, "but for some individuals, it is the number one love language."
- holding hands
- Sitting right next to the person
- rubbing their back
- combing through their hair with your fingers
Being physical with your partner in the most simple of ways allows them and yourself to feel secure, loved, desired, and even protected.
Here's to learning more about our loved ones with the 5 love languages...when you can understand your significant other's love language-both how they show their love and how they want to be shown love-you will be able to have a more harmonious relationship.
With knowledge of Love and the National Holiday, Valentine's Day, you can go out and spend some time with your significant other enjoying the day.
Don't stop there though, as this day is also to show love to your family, friends, and even your pet(s).